Red Blooded American Boy

Archive for the ‘Food’ Category

After getting some very fine takeout Chinese food in Tinley Park, Illinois, I began looking for desert in the depths of my infamous “smiley face” bag. I found several fortune cookies waiting to be opened. It always seems to me that each fortune cookie has a little town-crier in it. When the overlapping edges of cookie are peeled away, this little guy pops out and belches some profound wisdom, charming complement or impaling insult. Today my fortune said the following:

“A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.”

At first, this message is rather cutsie on words and almost entices a tickle to the point of humor. However, it is deeply fascinating. The imagery such a phrase gives brings to mind a double-edge sword. In a battle we will all use our sword to make progress in the fight. Yet, a mistake or slip can cause us great harm and even destroy us.

This is our government today, a double-edged sword. Our government claims to be a weapon in the fight for progress, but will cause us great harm and even destroy us if we make a mistake. But, who is deciding what a mistake is? Those who make the sword – or government would be the decision makers in this case. Rule makers are the rulers. Government will give us the sword and we in turn will kill our liberty and freedom with it.

This is what “…sacrificing for the greater good…” means. We surrender and the state survives.

Put another way, one side of the sword is “doing wrong” and the other is “doing well.” Either way, something is getting destroyed and even killed. Such is the nature of our modern government, who seeks everyday to find a way to tax and fine us to the point of our own destruction and eventual dependence. There is no better way to ignite a Patriot than to inflict destruction and dependence.

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A new study shows that fat people live longer. That seems like good news for folks who have been graced with a few extra pounds. But, thats not good news for the government provision panels who will decide who gets care. See, fat people are supposed to die. They decay even quicker when life preserving medical treatments are restricted. Now the government will have to deal with fat people living longer! That will be way too expensive.

Weight-challenged people have been told they are the walking dead. The higher incidence of diabetes, hypertension, heart conditions, orthopeadic traumas and respiratory difficulties give American fatties a train ride to death’s doorstep. In contrast, this study reveals that skinny people have fragile health. In effect, they die from lack rather than surplus. The overweight should be dying from a shorter and intense period of sickness. They will now continue to cost the USA (Universal Sick of America) by being a prolonged burden on the system. Those diseases are not cheap to treat, you know. The longer a fat person stays alive, the more treatment they receive. That totals to alot of fat cash.

I guess it’s just best to be fat and happy. Thats at least until a fat-tax comes waddling around.

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Your mother warned you.  Don’t put that thing in your mouth.  After all, you never know where it has been.  Now mom’s wisdom goes beyond the toys at the neighbor’s house.  Next time you get a dip of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, you better think twice.  Ben and Jerry’s has declared a flavor “Hubby, Hubby” in support of gay marriage.  So, when I see a B&J advertisement begetting a phallic ice cream scooper connotation – well, I get very suspicious that the scooper may have some other function besides dipping cream.

  What exactly does ice cream have to do with gay marriage?  Nothing.  Why does the ice cream name only refer to male gay marriage?  Shouldn’t there be a “Honey, Bunny” or “Bush, Tush” flavor to represent the female wing of the Homosexual party?  Yikes, I forgot “Bush” is a bad word for America hating lefties.

Nonetheless, BENdover Jerry is exploiting the gay community in order to stimulate controversy.  They know a certain section of the population (all of us straight folks) would find such a flavor very tasteless.  Nowadays there is no better advertisement than free advertisement ejaculated from controversy.  What better way to grab some market share by making themselves even more famous.

This sort of marketing is also a form of discrimination.  Why not have a flavor that represents polygamist couples?  You know, a flavor like “John,Kate,Cathy,Patty.”  Forget it.  That will not happen because homosexuals are not really interested in equal marriage.  They only want marriage to be what they think it should be.  Discrimination is used as an argument to support gay marriage.  But, when applying the same litmus test to the gay marriage agenda, logic reveals that the self-proclaimed victims are in fact just as guilty. 

For this reason, I think that ice cream scooper is really a “pooper scooper.”  The homosexual marriage agenda is just full of crap.

In my business travels, I get to eat at many different restaurants. From Barbacoa to Zuccotto, I eat all kinds of food, too. It is amazing how versatile and dynamic the flavors cooked in our country are.  With so much fast food out there, a great meal with uniqueness and character is such a treasure.  Nothing beats sitting down in a local place that captures the area’s attitude and flavor.  Often it is the area’s translation of food that is so interesting.  Mexican food in Fargo is different than in Florida, for example.

Heineken Premium Light

A great beverage is a compliment to the artistic nature of a epulation journey.  I have had many different kinds of beers with different foods.  Domestic beers such as Natural Light and Coors Light have been favorites of mine for a long time.  While these favorite domestics go well with steak and potatoes, they do not blend in well with Italian or Japanese cuisine.

My recent favorite has been Heineken Premium Light.  This beer is extremely smooth and does not cause flavor conflicts on the palate.  The taste is gentle but not weak.  In other words, you know you are drinking a great tasting beer but do not only taste the beer.  I have found it to be best with Italian pasta and a spicy Mexican dish.

The beer is light on the burp factor, not forcing a rebel yell after each swig.  It has a 3.5% alchohol content which if consumed with food at a good pace, should not put you into DUI territory.   Nevertheless, be responsible when drinking.

Be responsible when eating, too.  Enjoy the meal with a Heineken Premium Light.

This is a fantastic video of some high spirited Camp Staff, making dinner time more interesting. I give this five flags!